The Game of Life

Confession:  I love game shows. Not the current day versions with hipster hosts, electronic scoreboards and monitors, and silly contestants running around making a mockery of the art. No, I like the good, old-fashioned ones from the 1970s. You know the ones -- the host, decked out in a three-piece suit, holding a foot-long microphone, the cord snaking around his ankles, a serpentine swirl of cigarette smoke wafting above his head, exchanging small talk with his contestants and panelists.


What's your name, darling?
     Sylvia.
And where are you from, Sylvia?
     Poughkeepsie.
And what do you do there in Poughkeepsie, Sylvia?
     I'm married and have two boys.
Well, isn't that wonderful. OK, Sylvia, let's see if we can't win some money.

In today's line up, I do still enjoy Jeopardy! and I've watched with some level of interest newbies such as Wipeout and American Ninja Warrior. But try stacking up a current Family Feud, hosted by Steve Harvey, with one from the 70s or 80s hosted by Richard Dawson. It's no contest.

Yes, Steve gets cracked up by his contestants and their off-the-wall answers ("Name something that follows the word 'pork.'"  "Cupine," one contestant answered.), he sweats a lot and he'll whip out a handkerchief and mop his shiny, bald head like a Baptist preacher in Hattiesburg in July.

But, to me, it's no match for Richard Dawson, kissing each female contestant (on the lips), holding his cue cards with his pinky out like he's at afternoon tea, and prancing around like a peacock between the two sides of the stage. No one can match the way he would summon answers to be revealed on the board with the magic words, "Survey says?!"

There was even a funny moment across the pond on their version of the Feud. Check out one of my favorites....the "Turkey Episode."

British Family Feud "Turkey" Episode



Of course, there was a time I could recite the entire opening for Wheel of Fortune..."Look at this studio filled with glamorous merchandise..."

And I honed my math skills and grocery shopping prowess by watching The Price is Right.

I'd be remiss, though, if I didn't mention my two favorites:  The Match Game and Hollywood Squares.

I can watch reruns over and over of Gene Rayburn on The Match Game, zipping around the stage between his panel of celebrity guests and his two contestants, quipping with the likes of Betty White, Richard Dawson, Brett Somers, and Charles Nelson Reilly.




But Hollywood Squares is probably my favorite. The ones with Paul Lynde made me laugh before I fully understood the art of double entendre and they make me laugh still today after having heard them over and over. Enjoy a laugh or two now, courtesy of Mr. Lynde.

Host:  According to the old song, 'At night, when you're asleep, into your tent I'll creep.' Who am I?
Paul:  The Scoutmaster.

Host:  In television, who lived in Doodyville?
Paul:  The Ty-De-Bowl Man.

Host:  Paul, why are forest rangers in remote locations ordering goats as standard equipment?
Paul:  Because the sheep are wising up?

Host:  The great writer George Bernard Shaw once wrote, 'It's such a wonderful thing, what a crime to waste it on children.' What is it?
Paul:  A whipping?