My Favorite Things

This is a great time as the year winds to a close to share my favorite things. If Oprah can do it, so can I. Now, O can buy each of you one of her favorite things where I can only sing their praises. Without further ado...

Valerie's Favorite Things | 2013

Downton Abbey
$47.00 (1st 3 seasons boxed set)
Grab a cup o' tea and settle in with the Crawleys.

Mio Liquid Water Enhancer

$3.79

Like Kool-Aid...for grown ups.

Bic Cristal Ballpoint Pen
$3.49/10 pack

Tervis Tumbler

$10.99

Great for not sweating/leaving rings. Slap a Tervis lid on and you have an awesome travel coffee cup. Fits in all cup holders. Dishwasher safe.

Neosporin Lip Health Overnight Renewal Therapy
$4.35

Nutella & Go

$1.50

MAC Cosmetics Paint Pot (in Painterly)

$20.00

Great eye shadow base but can also be worn alone.

Friday Night Lights

$64.00 (complete series on DVD)

Discovered it well after its run on TV but I'm a fan. Go Panthers!

Eucerin Intensive Repair Extra-Enriched Hand Creme

$5.00
Leaves hands soft without feeling greasy.

Downy Fabric Softener

$8.99

I'm cheap and love a good bargain so, despite growing up with Downy, I have always used store brand, generic, whatever is on sale fabric softener. We were out, I went to Costco and they were out of their store brand so I splurged and bought the real stuff. When your kid and husband ask "what's that smell? I like that." you know you're onto something. It's a joy reaching in the closet and pulling out something that smells like a spring garden. So, as much as it pains me (and my wallet), I have to admit the generic fell short on this one and I'm back to being a Downy girl.

So, from Downton Abbey to Downy, there you have it. Enjoy!

No Room in the Inn

Bird and I were Christmas shopping last night when we stopped at an intersection where an apartment building is located. On the curb was a pile of furniture and other belongings that looked something like this:

As we sat there silently with Christmas music playing in the background and my "to do" list running like a ticker through my mind, she asks "what's that?" I thought for a moment. I thought "well, it's someone who hasn't paid their rent" and "this is what happens when you make bad decisions" and not-so-nice words came to my mind like "deadbeat." But what I replied with was "well, that's an apartment building and if someone doesn't pay their rent, they get kicked out."

"But why is their stuff on the ground like that?"

"The landlord probably gave them several notices that they were behind in their rent and then that's what happens after your last notice...they clean out your apartment and throw your stuff out in the yard."

"So they sleep inside without their couch or their clothes?"

"No. The landlord takes the apartment away from them and they either come get their things or the trash man will."

Pause. The light turns green.

"Do you think their Christmas presents are in that pile? Where will they do Christmas?"

And just like that, a little girl with a heart of gold softens this oft-too-jaded soul and humanizes what is so easy to dehumanize.  There's a person behind that pile. Maybe a child. And where are they celebrating Christmas this year? And, more importantly, where are they sleeping tonight? I don't have answers to any of this. Just sharing a conversation.

Christmas Coping

So, I took a two-an-a-half year break from blogging? Why? I ran out of things to say and, to be honest, wasn't sure anyone cared whether I had something to say or not. Well, one of those things has changed. I have something to say. I may be saying to myself alone but I'm going to say it.

I don't want, like, or want to support businesses who open on Christmas Day.

My pacifist husband says, "well, you know, if we woke up on Christmas morning and didn't have AA batteries for some toy, you'd be glad Walgreens was open, wouldn't you?" The truth is:  maybe.  But, I'd like to think that the better version of myself would just cope. A notion we, as a society, have forgotten and gotten out of the habit. We want it bigger, better and NOW! Not in a minute, not tomorrow, but right this second. You know that old study some scientists did with little kids and they gave them a choice of having one cookie right that moment or waiting five minutes and getting two cookies and by and large all the kids chose the former option? That's what we are. A society of hungry, greedy, five-year-olds.

If we woke up on Christmas morning and didn't have batteries for the toy du jour, I'd like to think we'd say something like "well, let's play with the 50 other things you got. Or, maybe we walk over to a neighbor's house, exchange pleasantries, and then ask if they had a couple of batteries we would borrow.

I can't tell you in the moment what my reaction would be. I can only tell you what I hope it would be.

These are a few of my favorite things...

No "raindrops on roses" for this girl. Here are a few items I use (almost) every day (and highly value, to different degrees):

Covergirl LashBlast Mascara - used others (from cheapest drugstore to silly expensive department store). Haven't found one better.

iPhone - I didn't understand all the fuss at first but looking back at my old flip phone just seems  barbaric. I love being able to access the web, maps, a compass, set an alarm and make notes.

Otterbox "Commuter" Case for my iPhone  - like peas and carrots. Drop your phone often? Throw it in bottomless purse? Possibly forget it on roof of car occasionally? All in a day's work for Otter. :)

Diet Cherry 7-Up  - When I can't get to Sonic for a Happy Hour Sprite Zero with no ice and extra cherry, this is a good runner up. Hard to find but worth it (if you're into cherry-flavored stuff).xm Radio in the car  - Ahhh...music. I'm not terribly picky. The stations I have programmed are Margaritaville (all island/Buffett music, all the time), a 90s rock station (Alice in Chains, Stone Temple Pilots, Pearl Jam), a 70s easy listening station (Elton, Billy Joel, Simon & Garfunkel, Cat Stevens, Gordon Lightfoot), a catch-all "hits of today" station that plays everything from Christina and Brittany to Pink and Eminem, and an 80s station.

Colgate 360 Toothbrush - Yes, it's a manual. Yes, I've had electric toothbrushes. And, yes, I know they clean better than a manual. But there's just something satisfying with brushing vigorously until your wrist hurts and doing it on your own time, not just when a timer buzzes. This one does a great job. The bristles are neither too soft nor too harsh and there's a handy thumb rest and a tongue/cheek scrubber.

Keurig K-Cup Coffee Maker  - You can get the K-cups for around 60-80 cents each, in a variety of roasts, flavors, and even tea and hot chocolate. There's just something about having a perfect cup of coffee the minute your heart desires and not having to clean a dirty carafe and filter basket. It's a good thing.

Body Pillow - I just love pillows. I like to make a u-shaped boat around my head. I like one on top of my face. And, while pregnant, I discovered the long body pillow and have never looked back. I can't find a picture of what I have. It's like two standard pillows sewn together end to end. But...I did find this picture of this body pillow couple. Look how happy they look.

And, I found this contraption. Not sure what it is but I want one. Hello, pillow womb.

Heavy Cream...shhh. Makes the best whipped cream, delicious in mashed potatoes and makes any cup of coffee taste like restaurant, French press coffee.

Veterans Day 2010

Veterans Day Assembly at school. PieDaddy was out of town so Poppa had to represent Calleigh's family today. We're so proud of all of our family's veterans and their service to our country.

James Lloyd Mangrum 
1925-2005
Fought in Germany in WWII

Loren Max Eagan
1916-1991
Tank Commander, WWII; Active duty from 1942–1945; served at the Battle of the Bulge and in the Argyles; received Purple Heart for getting shot (shrapnel in back) – Army buddy didn’t believe he'd been wounded – thought he was kidding.

Thomas Hill Eagan
1942 -
Served 1961-1964. Basic training in Fort Jackson, SC. Helicopter training in Fort Rucker, AL. Helicopter mechanic SP-4 (specialist 4th class). Served in Verdonne, France & Pirmasens, Germany.

Brittain Tyler Mangrum
1987 - 
Serving 2007-Present. PFC currently serving in El Paso, Texas, after finishing a tour in Iraq.

James Edward Mangrum
1949 - 
Served 1968-1972. Petty Officer Second Class. Served in San Diego, California; Millington, Tennessee; Atsugi, Japan; & Florida. Electronics Technician with "crypto clearance" (highest clearance of Navy); worked with reconnaissance squadron.

You Look Tired

Occasionally, there's a well-meaning co-worker who will comment,"you look tired." Several of us have commented that she may as well say, "you look fat" but we do admit that the intentions are probably not as malevolent as they are received. I like to think it's a weird way of saying "you look busy. Is there anything I can do to help you?"

This has been a week, let me tell you. It had already been a busy stretch beginning March 31st with what was, has been and will be 11 pretty big events that I'm in charge of planning, coordinating & executing. These are in addition to other various duties of my job plus my "other" full time job of wife, mother & daughter.

Last Saturday rocked my world. I was already tired and run down and just seeking a little rest before the next group of events come around. Ha. One flood, one fire, one week later and I'm still searching for that rest.

Sunday and Monday, I dug through wet ashes at Daddy's house.

Tuesday, I returned to work for a little while only to find that my building had flooded over the weekend and got to dig a little more, rescuing as much as possible, moving stuff and trying to relocate offices.

Despite a series of events coming fast & furiously, my efforts turned to attending to our families and faculty affected by the storms. I set up a makeshift work space and began triaging those in need and trying to match up those who wished to help with those who needed it.

Wednesday, Thursday and Friday was much of the same. Getting a few new calls from those needing help and a massive outpouring of love and support from those wanting to offer assistance. We also moved offices twice more and got to experience the challenges of not knowing where we would be from day to day, whether we'd have the basics (phones, computers, printer, etc.). When I left Friday, we had 20 families who had been identified as needing help, all in various stages of devastation. We have over 100 families, though, at the ready, offering their help to those in need.

Today, we held a garage sale at our house. I know the timing seems odd but we've been trying to have a garage sale since March. Our garage, and, of late, our kitchen, dining room table, foyer, etc. has been consumed by "stuff" that we'd like to see move so we can move on with our lives. We came home Thursday and had a flier in the mail announcing that a neighborhood sale was planned for today so we scurried and hustled and got ready to participate on little notice.

So, for the last week, I feel like I've been running mad, carrying and lifting heavy stuff, living with uncertainty and just feeling generally drained every which way - emotionally, physically, etc., etc.

There is good news though:  I'm alive to feel tired. (Some lost their lives.) I have a computer with which to communicate. (Some still don't have power.) My house is standing, safe & sound, and without mud or water standing inside. (Some are dealing with incredible challenges and clean up ahead.)

My presence will go with you, and I will give you rest. (Exodus 33:14)

I have set the Lord always before me. Because he is at my right hand, I will not be shaken. (Psalm 16:8)

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight. (Proverbs 3:5-6)

Daddy Update 05.03.10

You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.

-- Jeremiah 29:13

We're doing OK. It was a long, 12+ hour day today but we accomplished what we set out to do. Jason and I went over to what was left of the house with Daddy today and packed up any remaining items of interest, value, etc. At least the sun was shining. It was exponentially harder yesterday digging through rubbish, piles upon piles, while the rain beat down on us through the open roof.

Today, we worked our bottoms off. And chatted with well-meaning neighbors, chased off nosy ones with cameras, and talked to contractors, sub-contractors, insurance adjusters, city Police, city Fire, and city codes. The firemen who came by today told us we all needed to be wearing masks so we ran to the store and got those. The smell is just gross. It's dirty and wet and sad with just the tiniest hint of that sweet campfire smell. After a while, your eyes and nose burn and you're coughing. Our clothes and any exposed skin were covered in black soot. Jason gets a special thank you for allowing me to run to Target looking like Hitler. I went in the rest room and was dismayed to see I had a tiny, jet black ash mark right under my nose.

As I write, Daddy is settled into what will be his home for the next few months - an extended stay hotel near his house. They accepted pets and their rates and amenities were good plus it's conveniently located to his house so it worked out.

The insurance company couldn't write off the house completely so the plan is to bring in a contractor who will tear down and rebuild the affected part of the house. They predicted a 3-month timeline. Knowing how these things go, Daddy is prepared for a 6-month stay at his hotel.

Thank you all for your calls, emails, prayers, etc. We truly are blessed. God is good. 

And, there are lessons galore in this little incident and I will share as many as I am able to learn with you all as possible. Here goes the 1st few:

1.  Don't put off to tomorrow what can and should be done today. That may mean "write your will." Or, "increase your homeowners' insurance." Or perhaps it's just "tell that person how much they mean to you."

2.  You do not need 18 mixing bowls. Or 7 winter coats. If you're reading this, you are blessed beyond words. We have too much stuff in our lives. We're cluttered. Now I'm not planning on selling off all my possessions and going to live on a commune but this has made me realize how much stuff we accumulate. And that's all it is...stuff.

3.  Make copies of all your important paper work (including important phone numbers and contact info) and put it in a safe place (i.e., somewhere other than your home).

4.  If you have a neighbor who suffers a similar fate, here's what to do (and not do):  DON'T: call; drop by just to say hi; stand out front just shaking your head; keep driving by slowly just to look out your car window; take pictures of a stranger's house; allow your kids to ride bikes and walk around while the people are trying to clean up. DO:  bring bottled water if the family is there working; offer your clean/functioning bathroom if you live nearby; offer to run errands/go pick up lunch; text or email your sentiments so they know you care but can keep working and don't have to stop what they're doing to answer the phone; bring empty milk crates, Rubbermaid tubs and trash bags.

5.  Do not get a leather wallet wet. And, if you do, don't put it in the microwave to dry out. And, if you do, two minutes is too long. There's a popcorn setting and a beef wellington setting but not a wallet one so I guessed. Guessed wrong. (See pic above)

Back of house from driveway. Kitchen on left; garage on right.

Garage

Standing in den. Hallway on left. Foyer on right. New skylight above.

Jason standing in front yard beside some old bicycles which were in the attic over the garage and flew to opposite side of yard during explosion. The road you see behind him is the one where the river is on the opposite side. Compare this picture with previous picture (#1) in this album. It's the same intersection, two days later.

Juxtaposition of beauty and devastation.

Some things escaped almost, if not completely, unscathed.